I am proud of who I am, not for the sake of being different or unique but because so many people like me don’t have the chance to be proud. There are name changes to do, different gender marker laws in every state, high rates of abuse, friends to mourn, and an identity that you must wear on your sleeve or hide entirely.Īs for me, I wear my transness proudly. We have to go through therapists who might have zero experience with trans people and convince them that we’re trans enough to need to transition medically. Trans-Exclusive Radical Feminists continue to fight against our right to exist. Hell, we only got equal protections under the Civil Rights Act this year.Įven in what should be welcoming spaces within the LGBTQ community, there are other queer people saying that we shouldn’t be included. To know that trans people will continue to be deadnamed and misgendered by the media when they die, that our suicides continue to be blamed on us and not on how often we’re abused, and that the trans panic defense (when our murders are blamed on us because our murderers are afraid of being seen as gay) is still a legal, valid defense in most states. I think about how, if I die any time soon, it’ll be up to my fiancée and my friends to make sure my family doesn’t bury me in a suit or put my deadname on my headstone.įor me, and I believe for many of the trans people I know, it’s frustrating - infuriating - to know that it will continue. I think about Emerald Kelliher, who died in Montgomery in January of this year, being deadnamed and misgendered in her obituary. I think about names from the past - about how Dana Martin, who was murdered in Montgomery in January of last year, was misgendered in the initial reports of her death. This year, in the few days before the twentieth, I think about how I’ll see the name of someone I knew. For me, it’s one of the hardest days of the year every year I read the list of names, I think about how my community is hurting, and I realize, every year, that any one of those lists could have my name on it. Content Warning: This post contains references to transphobia, homophobia, hate crimes against transgender people, and suicide.Įvery year on November 20th, we hold a vigil to remember all the trans victims of murder and suicide the world over.
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